Friday, February 11, 2011

A McDonald's tale.

  Today wasn't any thing out of the ordinary.  I had the day off and when my beautiful wife got home from work we decided to go out for lunch.  It's something we pretty much do each and every day.  After lunch, we run a few errands then it's time to pick up my daughter from school.  
   Knowing my daughter, I offer to take her to McDonald's after we pick her up from school.  She's down with that so we proceed to get her something to munch on.  As usual we go through the drive thru and make our order.  After a few minutes we drive up to the window and get our food.  
    It's when we are driving away I decide to make sure that we got everything we ordered.  I'm not the biggest fan of McDonald's but my kid just loves it.  So as usual I order an UNsweetened Iced Tea.  As usual they give me the wrong drink.  Normally I drink what they give me but today it pisses me off.
     I look at the wife as we have driven almost two blocks away and tell her to turn the car around.  She gives me that look of "what in God's name are you doing?" then turns the car around.  As we pull back into the parking lot I'm cussing to myself, wondering what I'm going to do or say.  I get out of the car with drink in hand and go inside.
     As I stand in line waiting a young gal comes up and asks me how she can help me.  At this point I'm impressed with her customer service skills.  I tell her my plight of the tea mess up and she then tells me she'll take care of it.   This young lady then goes over and starts to pour me another drink when a "manager" type of gal tells her to give me a cup and have me pour my own drink.
     This little fat bitch then looks at me with that look of "fuck off".  It's now I'm really pissed!  I go and get my own drink and then tell the first gal thank you for all of her help and I'm sorry that her superior is a pathetic answer to management.  Then I turn and walk away.  About this time I hear the first gal telling another manager about how she was taking care of my miscue.  
     After this girl starts talking the fat "cunt" that over ruled her starts speaking up.  Now it's time for me to turn around and take care of some business.  I tell the "overall" manager that his employee did a fantastic job of taking care my problem.  I told him that his fat cunt secondary manager needs to check herself and learn some manners and customer service abilities.  Then the two bit fat whore rolls her eyes at me!
    I'm usually really calm in these situations until today.  This is when I let this retarded cunt know whats going on!  I proceed to let her know that she'll never be anything more then a "secondary" manager at a McDonald's.  She'll most likely live on the welfare most of her life because no man in his right mind will want nothing to do with her unless it involves a blow job.
   I let her know that most likely that she was born out of wedlock because her mother was nothing more then a two bit whore needing some loving or some extra cash for some cheap smokes.  I then tell her I wouldn't fuck her even if I were dead or high on heroin.  Actually both are about the same!    What people need to understand is that if you work in retail, the customer isn't always right but they are the people who are paying your goddamn salary! 
     I work in retail.  I manage in retail.  The customer is always your number one priority! Make the customer happy and they will return.  Make the customer happy and they will let your immediate bosses know how good of a job your doing.  Make the customers happy and you will make it far.  If your not making the customers happy, then your pretty much swimming up shit creek.

Thursday, February 10, 2011

More Facebook bullshit.

 I have a Facebook account.  Hell, who doesn't?  If you don't have a facebook account, your pretty much dead.  I'll be honest, I check my shit on there every day.  I will say this though.  I am not addicted!
    I've been watching this craze for awhile now and I've got to be honest, this shit is down right stupid.  First things first.  I've got a few friends on my friends list. My friends list isn't very big and I don't want it to big.  I can honestly say that everyone on my friends list is someone I know. When I look at other friends pages, sometimes I'll see someone else I might know and haven't added to my friends list.  I look at their pages and notice that some people have over 1,000 friends.
    I call bullshit!  I've known alot of people in my life.  I come from a really large family on both my mother and father.  I work in retail.  I'm a salesman with tons of meeting potential and I promise you that I do not know over 1,000 people!  That's just plain ass bullshit!  Then there's the people who live their goddamn lives on this facebook shit.  Who gives a fuck if your son just won a medal at the "lesbian wannabe Olympics!"
     What about the idiots that make "friends" with famous people on facebook?  You know the ones.  The ones who have say Paul McCartney as a friend and comment on everything that is written about Paul just like they were best friends.  Wanna know something idiot?  The famous people have hired hands to do the facebook for them.  If your famous, how much time would you actually have to hang out on there?
     What about the people who air their private shit on facebook?  I mean straight up trailer park shit going on here people!   "My baby's daddy gets out of jail today!"  "He's going to come home and we be going to make more babies!"  "That will give us 11 kiddos before we are 30 years old!"  People who do this are fucking retarded in bred assholes who need to be dropped off on an island!
    Then there's the person who thinks they are alot better then others.  You know the ones.  The ones who show you what they are having for dinner every night by showing you a pic of it.  I think the next time I drop a deuce I'm going to take a pic of it and call it "poopoo pie".  Fuck picture takers!
   What about the idiots that want to invite you to all of their games?  Here's what I think.  TAKE YOUR GAMES AND SHOVE THEM UP YOUR FUCKING ASS!  Just sayin....  What about the people who want to remember everything from the past and can't get into the now or the future?  Leave all of the old time photos and shit behind.  Jump on the NOW train and welcome to here.  It's that fucking simple.  
    If someone wants to know anything about you, most will ask.  You don't need to advertise your life to everyone in the world.  Please keep Facebook a cool thing to use for social networking.  If you can't do that please fuck off and die!

Wednesday, February 9, 2011

Is Lindsay Lohan really that stupid?

Our favorite Hollywood young diva is at it again.  Lindsay Lohan is being charged with felony theft in L.A.   Lohan reportedly stole some kind of bobble worth a reported $2500.00.  
    Now if you remember, this isn't the first time Lohan has been in trouble.  She's had drunken driving charges.  Dope charges.  Been to court ordered rehab not once but twice.  She's a straight up Hollywood skank.  The dumbest thing is that she just got out of jail and rehab not to long ago.
    If by chance you did steal Ms. Lohan, your a straight up dumb cunt.  You've had all the chances in the world.  For the life of me, I can't figure out why.  First of all your pretty ugly.  Being a red head makes it worse.  You've had your share of Hollywood cock.  Hell you've had your share of pussy.  One day your in love with some Hollywood hunk wannabe.  The next day your in love with some dyke d.j.  Make up my fucking mind Lindsay!
    I can't figure it out.  One day your sucking cock and loving every minute of it.  The next day your a full blown lesbian.  If this is your way of getting more attention thrown on you, people are getting pretty fucking sick of it.  Do me a favor whore.  Get your shit together so you can do another retarded Disney movie.  Maybe by the time you get your shit together everyone will have forgotten you.
    If by chance you get off of the felony charge I hope you can enter rehab and actually try and get cured.  If by chance you do get found guilty I hope you get 25 years in prison or even better the judge tries to help out the world and orders the death penalty for you.
    If I had my way bitch it would be death by electric chair!

Tuesday, February 8, 2011

Poor A-Rod

Alex Rodriguez and his girlfriend Cameron Diaz were seen together at last Sunday's Super Bowl.  Both were seen in VIP suites watching the game when Diaz decides to feed Rodriguez some popcorn.  Ahhhh Now that's cute.  They must be in love or she likes to think she's his mommy.
   We all know that the Packers went on to beat the Steelers in Super Bowl XLV.  What happens now is funny as hell to me.  It's been reported today that A-Rod is pissed off at the FOX camerman for showing this on national tv during the most watched show in the world.
    Ok Mr. A-Puss, were you pissed off when you most likely got the tickets and the suite to the Super Bowl for free?  Were you pissed off over the red carpet treatment?  Were you pissed when Diaz was giving you a blow job the night before?  It's time to get over yourself Mr. Rodriguez.  Your a fucking celebrity.  Your paid millions upon millions of dollars to be in the limelight.  People are going to watch your every move no matter where your at or what your doing.  For the money you make, you should be grateful to each and every person out there paying your salary.  Don't tell me the Yankees are paying it!  If it weren't for the fans and advertisers, there would be no huge salary for you.  
    I didn't see Ashton Kutcher and the Bush's being pissed off for being shown live on national television.  Get off of your high horse Alex and start being humble for once you steriod abusing cocksucker!  If Cameron wants to wipe your ass while sitting at the Super Bowl next year you better smile at the camera or get the fuck off of the planet!

Monday, February 7, 2011

America's Team

  It's been 24 hours since Super Bowl XLV was played.  In this game you had historic pro football teams playing against each other.  6 time Super Bowl Champion Pittsburgh Steelers vs. 3 time Super Bowl Champion Green Bay Packers.
   The Packer won the first two Super Bowls ever played then another with future hall of fame texter Brett Favre.  The Pittsburgh Steelers have won 6 Super Bowls, with 4 of them being in 6 years.  The Steelers were the TEAM of the 70's.
    Now I've lived in the midwest pretty much my whole life.  When you live in the midwest, you have a handful of teams you can follow.  Kansas City Chiefs, Chicago Bears, Minnesota Vikings, St. Louis Rams and the Green Bay Packers.  Personally I follow the Chiefs and kind of observe the rest when I can.  
   My rant today is about all the people who I know and work with that wanted to root for the Steelers.  How in the hell can you do that?  Most of them don't even know where Pittsburgh even is!  How can you people be "big" Steelers fans?  I know you've watched them on tv and such but have you really watched them?  When in a certain region, root for the local team!!
    How in the hell can you support something you've never been around?  That's like a dude from Miami rooting for the San Diego Chargers.  Just doesn't work!  Now off of my rant.  This was a great game to watch.  You had excitement from both teams.  You had drama from both teams.  Then in the end, the right team won.  Nice victory to the Green Bay Packers.  Just make sure next year the "Black Eyed Peas" don't perform again!

Saturday, January 29, 2011

National Signing Day.

   National Signing Day is in the next few days for college football.  This is the day when high school seniors and junior college transfers can sign with Division I schools to play football.  This is the day when the rich get richer.  When i say this I mean you have the powerhouses of college football getting all of the "blue chip" recruits.
    Your top teams like Texas, Alabama, Oklahoma, Penn State, Michigan and others get their way with all of the top incoming players.  Your second class citizens of college football work their collective asses off to get 2 and 3 star athletes to come and play for their universities.  
     The whole time you have all of this money with the "major" schools being passed around to help the football program.  With this money, they can upgrade the stadium, the practice facilities, the weight room, the player personal room, the locker room.  Everything is fantastic for the "upper" class programs.
   When national signing day starts, you have these retarded rituals being performed in area high schools.  They sit around with about 5 to 10 different college hats infront of them.  Then the drama builds as they all of a sudden pull the hat of the college they are going to out and put it on their heads.  I call bullshit!  If that's my kid I tell them to just put it up on the table and never ever tease a program with your decision!
   My question is this.  How many father and son's are we going to see asking for money upfront to these universities?  We don't need another Cam Newton bullshit saga going on.  I know it's going to happen somewhere but we dont need it advertised all over the fucking world!  Cecil Newton wasn't wrong in doing what he did.  Cecil wasn't wrong for trying to get ahead.  Hell its the American way!  Cecil Newton was wrong for getting caught!
   In a perfect world I would love to see some sort of equality between all of college sports.  The bigger schools will always get the better athletes.  The bigger schools will always get more money.  The bigger schools will always get way ahead of the smaller schools.  To me that sucks some major goat balls.
     Good luck to your favorite teams this year when it comes to signing major players!  

Friday, January 28, 2011

Kaleb T.

  My beautiful wife and I just got home from a nice dinner with my oldest daughter and her boyfriend Kaleb T.  Tonight was all about eating mexican food and talking about life in general.  My daughter Cassandra has been seeing a young man by the name of Kaleb T. for awhile now.  
    They've known eachother for a bit now but rekindled their friendship at an Iowa State Cyclones football game tailgate.  I've had the pleasure of meeting Kaleb on a few occasions.  He seems pretty nice and all.  The number one thing is that he makes my daughter happy.
  She's constantly bragging on him.  Making sure that she lets her mother know whats going on with them.  When I've been around him, I've found him to be a nice guy.  He seems to be treating my daughter well and that's all I want in life.  Her to find love with someone who will make her happy during good times and bad.  If not, I'm going to be honest, I'll have to hurt someone.  She is my baby anyways.
   Kaleb T. and Cassandra came home from school this weekend.  His family lives about 20 miles from our family.  Cassandra calls her mother and tells her that she wants to go out and eat.  It's then we decide to meet at Cass's favorite place to eat.  The local mexican cafe' is our place eat at.
The beautiful wife and I show up about 5 minutes earlier then Cass and Kaleb T.  That's ok they had a long trip home.  After everyone is there we order.  Kaleb asks me if it's ok to order a drink from the bar.  I say sure, thats ok in my book.  He orders a XXX Mexican beer.  I order a pitcher of beer.  He looks at me in amazement.  I give him that look ..  "Yes son, I have pissed out more beer then you will ever drink".  
   The food comes and after awhile I look at Kaleb and his beer is gone.  It's then I have the waiter get another glass so him and I can share a beer together.  The next thing you know we are having a good time and all is well.
   I ask him if he likes my daughter.  He tells me that he likes her alot and cares about her.  I ask him if he likes the ISU Cyclones. He tells me he loves the ISU Cyclones.  SO far so good with this boy.  At this time he's a keeper.  At this time I decide to order another pitcher of beer.  We go along with eating dinner.  We converse.  All is good.  I look at Kaleb and notice he's enjoying his beer as he eats.  
    I continue with my dinner and my conversation.  It's then I notice Kaleb T. slowly but surely reaching for my pitcher of beer.  It's then I look at him and say in a stern voice.  "Son, you can love my daughter.  You can love my Cyclones.  Just do me one favor and never EVER love my beer"!!!!

Thursday, January 27, 2011

Legalize?

Marijuana is a plant.  It's a creation from God himself.  You can find marijuana about anywhere in the world.  It grows wild.  Some grow it for money making purposes.  
    Marijuana possession is against the law.   In some states though, marijuana is legal to possess if used for medical purposes.  Now here's where I get to thinking and wondering about shit.  Now I'm no virgin to the semi - party life.  Yes my dear friends, I have smoked marijuana.  I've never inhaled though.  oops.  That's my best Bill Clinton impression.
    I've been thinking about this alot lately.  Why not just go ahead and legalize it all.  I'm not saying I'd go back to smoking rope.  It had it's day and I'm over it.  What I'm saying is that maybe if we legalize it, we can tax it and help with the National Deficit.  Think about this for a minute.  I might actually make some sense here.
   If we legalize it we can charge a HUGE tax on it.  Here's my example.  A pack of cigarettes cost between $5.00 and $7.00 per pack depending on where you live.  The reason of the price difference is because different states charge different amount of tax per pack.  There are 20 smokes per pack.  Thats on an average of .60cents per smoke.  How about we sell a pack of ten joints for $50.00 per pack?
   That's $5.00 per joint.  The cost of that pack to produce at it's highest might be $1.00 per pack.  That's a $49.00 dollar profit.  If the government charges 50% tax on that pack they make $24.50 per pack sold.  That's straight up money baby!
   When people think of people who smoke pot they think of the dudes who came straight out of "Fast Times at Ridgemont High".  Not true.  I know for a fact of people who smoke that are some serious professionals.  Doctors, lawyers, government workers, police officers.  The list can go on and on.
   We can still make it available for people with medical problems.  Infact, I feel that the insurance companies should pay for the medicinal marijuana for some one who needs it.  It has to be doctor approved.  It should be available.  That's my opinion and I hope it comes to fruation in every state in the United States of America.
    In these United States of America if your caught and convicted of drunk driving, it will cost you more then a simple traffic ticket fine.  It will cost you some jail time.  Your fines for this offense are out of this world.  Your insurance rates will more then double for atleast 7 years.  Your going to have to take driving classes.  Your license will be suspended.  Long story short.. Your simply put.  Fucked!
   If we legalize grass, we should implement the same kind of laws that are associated with OWI's.  Make the people who smoke it and drive responsible for their actions.  In fact, make it a mandatory 1 year in prison at a minimum. If you are caught driving under the influence of weed, you will prosecuted to the full extent.  It's damn simple to me.
   People are going to smoke weed.  It's a simple thing to acknowledge.  It's going to happen and there is nothing we can do about it.  If you legalize it, there's a great chance that illegal activities with selling it will go down.  If by chance someone is caught selling grass illegal, put their asses in the joint for a minimum of 5 years.  
    We as a government need to sit down and really debate this.  The means in the end could be so beneficial that we could as a country start getting out of debt.  Look at Amsterdam.  Their crime rate is ten fold lower then the U.S.A's.  Their debt rate is lower then ours.  It's considered one of the happiest places in the world to live!  Just sayin.....
    Marijuana is plant.  It's a plant made by God.....

Monday, January 24, 2011

Is Charles Manson a genius?

    Born November 12th, 1934 in Cincinnati, Ohio.  Today he would be 76 years old still trying to get out of prison.  This is Charles Manson.  A man who was able to brain wash people into doing his evil adventures.  This kind of reminds me of another gentleman named Adolph Hitler who was able to get an entire country to back him up with his ridiculous ways.
    Born in Cincinnati, Ohio to a 16 year old whore, Manson never knew his father.  He was given the last name of Manson because his mother had been fucking some guy named William Manson.  It seems his father was a man named "Colonel Scott".  It's a possibility that Manson's father was a black man who'm the whore mother had sex with while underage.  Years later when confronted about this, Manson denied that a black man could have ever fathered him.
    Manson's mother was once known to have tried selling Charles for a pitcher of beer.  Now if that's not fucked up, I don't know what is!  After his drunken whore of a mother got arrested with her piece of shit brother Manson is put in his aunt and uncles home.  Three years later Manson's mother retrieved him.  In 1947, his mother tried to put Charles in a foster home.  There were no homes for him to go to so he was put in the Gibault School For Boys.
   After 10 months Manson fled to be with his mother.  It's now that he had a ton of run ins with the law.  He did some penny anti shit by robbing grocery stores and such.  After some time in prison for robbery Manson moved to San Francisco, California.  With a friends help, he moved into an apartment in Berkley, California.  It's there met a young lady named Mary Brunner.  They seemed to hit it off and got along well.  He moved in with her after some resistance.  People think his mother made him weary of women all together.  He soon got over it.  By the time him and Mary had broken up, there were 18 other women living in this apartment.
     Soon after this, Charles had moved to southern California to find himself.  He befriended singer songwriter of the famed Beach Boys, Dennis Wilson.  He was getting high on drugs and had no worries in the world.  It's then he befriended alot more people and moved to a place called Spahn Ranch.  It's there were drugs and drink were availabe at all times.  It's there were he made love to any woman he wanted.  "Charlie" was the KING of the ranch and had his way for anything.
   After some time, Charlie decided innocent people needed to pay for their sins.  He had his "people" of Spahn Ranch go out and kill.  This is when the beautiful Sharon Tate was murdered as she was pregnant with director Roman Polanski's baby.  It made world headlines.  Here's where I question if this man was a genius.  While in jail, he had hundreds of people causing problems for the Los Angeles, California police department.  While in jail, he had people still killing for him.
    He had people carving swastika's in their foreheads.  He had people years after he was put in prison trying to kill the president!  He still has at the age of 76 people who will die or kill for him.  What the fuck?  This man has the power to change society just like Adolph Hitler and others.  If by chance you ever get to watch a parole hearing of his, DO IT!  This motherfucker is crazy as all get out and at 76 still scares the shit out of people.  Was he an inhumane person?  Fuck yeah he was!  He still is today!  Was he the type of guy to be scared of ?  Fuck yes he was!  Still is today at the age of 76!  Was he a genius?  Fuck yes he was!  Still is today!

Sunday, January 23, 2011

Aaron Rodgers. The new sheriff in Green Bay.

  It's Super Bowl 45 time for the Green Bay Packers!  God bless em all.  The Packers just knocked off their rival the Chicago Bears today.  I'm not a Packer or Bear fan, I'm just a fan of football.  I've said it over and over again.  I prefer the college game but still love to follow the NFL.
   This is the 5th time for the Packers to get to the Super Bowl.  They have won 3 and lost 1 so far.  Along the way, Bart Starr won the first two Super Bowl for the Pack.  Then came years of futility.  Years and years of nothing but heartache.  Then comes a man out of Southern Mississippi.  His name is Brett Favre.
    Favre was a back up quarterback in Atlanta when he was traded to Green Bay.  We all know what Favre did while he was in Green Bay.  He broke every record possible while playing there.  Brett wins a Super Bowl.  Brett loses a Super Bowl.  It happens.  Brett tore up the NFL for almost 20 years.  He did things that kids can only dream about.  I can honestly say that I have never ever seen a better NFL quarterback that ever played.
   Then a few years back Green Bay drafts this kid named Aaron Rodgers out of the University of California.  He's a great college qb but can he take care of business at the pro level?  Brett does his thing for a year and the next thing you know the Packers front office says it's time for Brett to hit the road.  He's traded to the New York Jets (where he shows his wiener to a hot chick who works in the front office!)  Brett does ok.  Then he signs with the Minnesota Vikings.  A true rival of the Packers!  Brett plays some of the best ball he's ever played!  Rodgers is plugging along and doing pretty damn good.  He's just under the radar is all
   Then the 2010-2011 season comes along.  Brett goes along with business in Minnesota and Aaron goes along with business in Green Bay.  Brett implodes and decides to retire for the umpteenth time.  Along the way Rodgers takes his team to the Super Bowl with some flair and attitude.  Nice win Green Bay and Aaron Rodgers!  Who the fuck is Brett Favre?

What's up with the NFL Conference Championship Trophy's?

  Ok, whats up with this shit of changing the NFL Conference Championship Trophy's?  Who's the fucking idiot who decided this?  The picture to the left show's former New England Patriot Teddy Brusci carrying the former trophy.  A classy one with tons of tradition.
    I'm watching the NFC Championship today between the Green Bay Packers and the Chicago Bears.  Green Bay kicks Chicago's ass and wins the game.  All right!  Trophy time people.  Then they bring out the gayest trophy ever to grace the NFL.  
   I'm looking at this piece of shit wondering what the hell is going on.  If NFL commisioner Roger Goodell ok'd this then he's a fucking idiot! This trophy doesn't show toughness!  This trophy doesn't show down right mean football!  All it shows is some artsy fartsy homo erotic martini drinking bullshit!
    Football isn't about art!  Football isn't about looking good!  Football isn't about queers!  Football is about mano v mano!  It's about playing tough games with a win or loss in your future.  It's about kicking the man across from you ass!  It's about blood, sweet and tears!  Give these deserving men a goddamn MAN'S trophy!  Not this shit that wants you to put on a tu-tu and sing Barbera Streisand!  FUCK THAT!
    I'm a huge fan of football and I don't need this shit to ruin my day.  Come Super Bowl Sunday, I want a great game between the Green Bay Packers and the Pittsburgh Steelers.  May the best team win.  I will say this.... If I see the winner get some kind of "fairy" trophy I will get ahold of the NFL corperate offices and bitch like no body ever has!  Football is a man's sport!  It's not for some "tulip" wanting to "pretty" it up!

Saturday, January 22, 2011

NFL Conference Championship Games

  Tomorrow is the NFL conference championship games. These games will determine who plays in Super Bowl 45.  In the early game which is to start at 2:00pm CST, we have the Green Bay Packers vs. the Chicago Bears.  This has alot of history between the two programs.  I expect a bloodbath with this game.
    Green Bay is the visitor with an up and coming quarterback by the name of Aaron Rodgers.  Chicago has Jay Cutler at quarterback who has a ton of NFL experience.  I'm looking at both sides of the ball when I try and predict this game.
    Green Bay has the more explosive offense in this game.  Chicago has the so called better defense in this game.  The only problem is that Green Bay's defense has been kicking ass and taking names lately.  The visiting Packers are a 3 point favorite for this game.  My mind and gut feeling is telling me that if I'm betting the spread take the Bears.  My gut is telling me for the win take Aaron Rodgers and the Green Bay Packers!
    We move onto the late game between the New York Jets vs. the Pittsburgh Steelers.  We have the most exciting coach in the NFL with Rex Ryan coaching the Jets.  We have the most exciting defense in the NFL with the Steelers.  New York has the better running game.  Pittsburgh has the better defense along with the better quarterback with Ben Rothlisberger.
    For some reason, I have this feeling that the Jets quarterback Mark Sanchez is going to light up the Steelers defense with his passing game.  The running game will start the Jets off with Sanchez taking up the slack in the passing game.  The Steelers can pass with the best of them but they can't run like the Jets.  I can see a back and forth game all night long.  I can see  this game going the distance.  In the long run, I see the New York Jets beating the Pittsburgh Steelers to advance to the Super Bowl for the first time in 42 years.
    My prediction is the Green Bay Packers vs. the New York Jets in SuperBowl 45.

How come?

  Sometimes I get bored real easy and my mind starts to drift.  Sometimes I get antsy and my mind starts to race.  Sometimes I get anxious and my mind goes into overdrive.  My latest thoughts have been about why things happen.  Why things go the way they do.  You know.  "How come"?
     How come all the cool chicks are lesbians?  How come when you go to the grocery store and you can't find anything to eat but you've still spent $100.00 bux?  How come when your an adult with a family your still scared of your mother?  How come going to the dentist's office still terrifies us all?
     How come when your using a public restroom and taking a shit you look over at the toilet paper dispenser and the toilet paper is all gone?  How come most wars are fought over religion?  How come their are homeless people starving and dying in the streets of the United States of American each and every day?  How come when you love someone with all your heart and soul it usually ends up shitting on you?
    How come when you go to the bar and find that hottie you want to bang like a screen door during a hurricane always ends up nasty as all fucking get out in the morning?  How come it's always to late to tell some one that you love them?  How come the best movies are always shown late at night?  How come after each and every time you go out for a good time you feel  like shit for the next 3 days?
    How come stupid people run our free country?  How come money can buy power?  How come the hard working son of a bitches are always the ones who are shit on?  How come it's the daughters that always make the daddy's of the world cry?  How come the world as we know it is going to shit over greed, jealousy, and hatred?  How come when great people trying to make a difference are treated like shit?
    How come a man's own mother is the greatest cook to ever walk the planet?  How come a woman can make a man steal, kill and die for her?  How come sometimes we treat our loved ones the worst?  How come in the depths of shit we can still hold our heads up and hope for the best?  How come the world is controlled by oil?  How come the people who run the oil don't care about the rest of the world?
    How come we can't love one another and try to get along to make the world a better place to live?
   

Friday, January 21, 2011

It's time for change in college athletics!

  Today I'm reading in the Des Moines Register about two former Iowa Hawkeye football players that were being tried for rape of another Iowa Hawkeye female athlete.  The story is that the girl went to a party and got drunk.  She then went back to the athletic dorms and got raped by two football players.  She turns them in and they lie about it.  Next thing you know they are arrested and a trial is set.
   Now almost 3 years later the trial has come to fruation.  The trial for these two pieces of shit takes almost 2 weeks.  The victim takes the stand.  One of the players cops a plea with the county attorney to testify against his former teammate and roommate.  The piece of shit takes the stand and reverses what he was going to testify about.  Tells everyone that she was the aggressor and she wanted to be raped.
   One of the rapists is found guilty of assault and that's it.  The verdict for the other comes out in  the next few days.  I'm really feeling bad for the victim in this case.  This girl get raped by not one guy but two and they get a fucking slap on the hand.  I call bullshit.  Then theres the rape accusation at Notre Dame.  The football player rapes the gal and then she reports it.  Notre Dame people do nothing.  The police do nothing.  The act of rape was pretty much ignored.  Infact the accused player was able to still compete in games while this investigation was going on.  Guess what happened next?  The accuser killed herself!  She commited suicide!
    These athletes need to be held accountable and held accountable now!  Fuck kicking them off the team.  Put their lazy spoiled asses in prison now!  Have someone rape their asses and ask them how it feels.  Motherfuckers need to die now.
    The NCAA needs to hold the universities accountable for the athletes actions.  They need to start taking away scholarships for the actions of the athletes who do these horrible things.  Hit  the university's in the pocket book and see how they like that shit!  Hell, take away some of the t.v. money and see what happens.  Hell take away some of the conference money and see what happens.  
    All I know is that I've got a college aged daughter that I worry about at her school.  There are young men walking around thinking they are cool as all fucking get out.  Then there are the athletes at this school.  These "kids" think their collective shit doesn't stink.  I'm afraid that my kid will be at a party and one of these degenerate fucks will take advantage of my little girl.  I tell her to have fun and enjoy the college life but be "real" careful.  Do not trust anyone!
    Make sure your careful of any one being an asshole I tell her.  I know your going to have a few drinks and such but don't get retarded drunk where you don't have a clue about where your at or whats going on.  I want her to make sure that there is one person in her group staying sober at all times.  I don't care how much the drunk girl bitches and moans that she's fine and ok.  That she doesn't need a babysitter and such.  The problem is that she does need a babysitter!
   We need the sober ones to stand up and make a stand to make sure their friends get home safe.  We need them to make sure that over zealous drunken athletes do not try and take advantage of these ladies.  The next thing I want is for these ladies to stand up for eachother. Fuck the universities pressure.  You can get lawyers to help you.  These establishments need to realize that they aren't God!!  The world doesn't evolve around the universities and their football programs.  Fuck them!
   What I want is for people to realize that alot of people are evil and need brought down for their actions.  These young ladies do not need to be victims who are ignored when it comes down to using the judicial system.  I hope and pray that this shit gets settled now instead of later.  We've already lost people because of selfishness on the part of universities and them making money off the athletic programs.

Wednesday, January 19, 2011

The Rich Get Richer.

  It was announced today that The University of Texas will be getting their own television network to broadcast athletic events. ESPN and The University of Texas have partnered with a 20 year $300 million dollar contract.
    My dear friend Steve "The Boss" Bossenberger claims he graduated from UT back in the 90's.  For the purpose of this blog I will agree with him.  Steve and his family are "pure" Texas backers without hesitation.  I'm happy for "The Boss" and everything like that but I'm also pissed off because this just secures The University of Texas more money in their athletic coffers.
   With more money, UT will be able to dominate the world of NCAA athletics.  To me, that's not fair.  What about the smaller schools trying to make it a go in Division 1 athletics?  Where does that leave them?  What about the schools like Kansas, Kansas State, Iowa State and Baylor?  How come they can't get some of the riches?  I know Texas is a huge market for ESPN but what the fuck?  
   Texas already has the largest athletic budget in the nation.  With an extra $15 million per year going into that it gives them an unrealistic advantage over all of the "small" market schools.  You can fit between 2 and 3 states of Iowa inside of the state of Texas.  It's that goddamn huge.  Your at a disadvantage in Ames, Iowa already when your recruiting against the University of Iowa, then this shit happens!
    In all of reality, I guess the little schools don't really matter.  The tv networks and the big brass at the NCAA want a "big" school like Texas in the National Championships every year.  It draws ratings and brings in more money to the big wigs in my opinion.  Fuck that!  What ever happened to equality?  I guess that's been thrown out the window years ago.
   My solution to all of this is to create a "Super" conference with your major programs and let them fight it out.  Winner take all.  Then create a "not so super" conference for the rest of the schools so they can fight it out like true players of the game.  Everyone loves the underdog but the underdog can't do shit against these "giants" of college athletics.  Money cures everyone's problems and their won't be enough for the little guy.
   I can say that I appreciate watching The University of Texas playing athletic games.  I just hate that they have the opportunity to win it all every year because of money.  I just want the little guy to have an equal chance of grabbing the gold ring.

Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Snooki! Aren't your 15 minutes of fame all used up?

  Some people are lucky to get noticed once in a lifetime.  Some people are lucky to have the world by the balls with their fame.  Some people can continue to be noticed their whole lives.  Some get their 15 minutes of fame.
   Then there is Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi.  She's this 23 year old wonder bitch from MTV's tv show "Jersey Shore".  She's loud, obnoxious, crude, rude and down right retarded.  Her and her cast mates are living in New Jersey at some summer house.  It's a house of Italian-American college aged kids living together partying, fighting, loving and pretty much being stupid so it can be filmed for reality tv.
    The one pain in the ass of the house is Nicole "Snooki" Polizza.  She stands 4'9" tall and I swear to you it looks like she weighs 175lbs.  This bitch is as fucking wide is she is as tall.  When I talk about Snooki, I want to commend her for being the skankiest piece of shit walking the earth today.  It's this simple.  There isn't enough beer in the world to get me drunk enough to fuck this sorry cunt.  True dat!
    She's made an ass out of herself for the last 3 years on tv.  Now she's just got done writing a book called "A Shore Thing" and is pimping her fat ass all over the network talk shows.  Watching her interviews, I have came to the reality that she's pretty fucking stupid.  Maybe it's just me thinking this but I'm willing to bet I'm not the only one.
    In some of the episodes you see her drunker then some sailor on a 24 hour pass.  The whole time she's trying to get some stupid drunk fucker to hammer her fat ass.  It usually happens.  My God above what the fuck are these people thinking?  I mean her ass is so goddamn fat you could stick a watermelon up their and never notice a difference!
    Here's my plea for 2011.  Try and cut down on the reality tv shows all over the networks.  This shit is getting old fast.  When I say fast, I mean old as yesterday.  To the guido's and guidettes of Jersey Shore, get a life.  Find something worth while.  Try and be somebody besides some fuck who thinks he/she is the next big thing.  Your not!!
    Last but not least.... Snooki.... Lose some weight.  Cut your fucking hair.  Clean up your language.  Take off half of the make up you use.  Last but not least.  Stop being a whore.  In real life and on television!
    

Sunday, January 16, 2011

When we were young.

   I've been sitting here watching old movies and catching up with old friends on facebook when I got to thinking about old times.  You know these times.  The times when we were young.  I can remember when I got my drivers license and driving as fast as I possibly could.  Now that I've gotten older and have a family I watch the speed limit because I'm afraid of speeding tickets, insurance rates raising, blowing an engine ect...
    I remember when I was younger my mother yelling at me for being to destructive in the house with my friends and how it would piss me off.  Now when my kids have friends over to the house I'm sitting on pins and needles waiting for these fucking heathens to leave my house.
   I remember eating pizza each and every day when i was a teenager.  Now If I eat pizza I'm laid up for a week with heartburn.  Remember when we could get about 4 of us and cruise the strip on about 5 bux?  Now if I want to cruise the goddamn strip I have to take out a second mortgage on my house.  I can remember when I would cash in cans to get enough money to go out with friends to the arcade to play "frogger" or "centipede" till my fingers bled.  Now my fucking kids are wearing 3-D glasses trying to find Osama Bin Laden so they can kill him.
   I can remember when I had to be home by midnight on Friday and Saturday nights.  Now the kids tell me that "shit don't happen till midnight".  What the fuck is that all about?  I can remember when I listend to Ozzy Osbourne and people thought it was the "Devil's Music" and I would go to hell.  Now we've got kids listening to Eminem singing how he needs to fuck his mother in the asshole and thats normal in today's society.  Lord have mercy!
    I can remember when if your mother caught your touching your wiener wink she would tell you to stop it because it could make you go blind.  Now you encourage your kids to touch their privates instead of engaging in full body contact.  I can remember when you would get into a fight with the local gang you would have a good 3 to 4 friends there to help you out.  Now if you get into a fight with the local gang you need 3 or 4 Uzi's to make it out alive.  
     I remember when I was younger and wanted to be so much older and now I wish I was so much younger.  Times sure are a changing people.

Friday, January 14, 2011

A tribute to family.

     The new year has past.  I'm excited about the future.  I'm pleased with the past.  Life as I know it is going well.  I just hope and pray that I don't fuck it up.  With this blog I want to thank a few people and make them known for me being who I am today.
   First things first.  I want to thank my mother and father for living life at it's fullest each and every day.  At their age, they need to enjoy as much as possible.  I want to thank my father Lee for taking me in as his own.  I want to thank my mother Linda for being the beautiful mother she was and will be to me.  She was one old tough bitch more then once when I needed it and now I know why.  Thank you mother.  I love you.
   To my brother Christopher.  Thank you for being solid with yourself and your family.  Even with an almost 11 year difference, I feel we are equal in life except I'm sexier and all of that shit. To my niece and nephews...  Aubree.  I love you and I wish and pray that everything you want will come true.  Remember this hun, life is what you make of it!  Work hard and never ever let anyone tell you otherwise!
    Caden Klug.  Well hello big boy!  Dream the impossible dreams son!  Make sure you work your ass off to reach the next level.  Never EVER let anyone tell you otherwise.  You my friend can go a long ways if you believe in yourself.  Do NOT let anyone tell you anything otherwise.
   TO my wife Melody.  THANK YOU for each and every year we've been together.  You are the most important woman in my life!  (it took me years to let Linda know that!)  You make my life special.  With what you've done with my children, I thank you even more.
   Samantha.   Keep up that beautiful smile.  I have this great feeling that someday you will grow into yourself and make plenty of people jealous.  Keep you nose to the grindstone.  Work for your life and people will notice!
    Cassandra!  You've made me proud over the years with your athletic prowess.  A parent couldn't ask for more.  Thank you for that.  I know you are kicking yourself in the ass for not trying harder.  Thats a life lesson my love.   To everyone in my family I thank you for being in my life.  Thank you thank you thank you!

Sarah Palin needs to go now!

  I believe in the right to own guns.  I believe in the right of freedom of speech. (thats why I do this!)  I believe in the matter of opinion.  I believe in the right to judge and vote for who you want in elected positions.  
    What I don't believe in is idiots that want to run our country.  It doesn't matter if it's Republican or Democrat.  Just be smart and try to make sense to the American people is all I ask!  You've got people bitching about Barrack Obama.  That's ok.  That is their right!
   People are bitching about the economy of the American society.  Thats ok.  I bitch about it also!  Then you have this stupid cunt from Alaska talking shit non stop!  
  Sarah Palin is a one hit wonder who will not go away.  She needs to shut her mouth and sign her 45 year old ass to a contract with Playboy.  Thats all she's worth in this free world we live.  I'm going to be honest here when I say this.  I'd stick my cock so deep into her pussy she wouldn't know whether to cum or shit her self.  Thats all she's worth!  She just had her reality show canceled because she's an idiot.  She tells people on her website she has a target list with sniper scopes as examples.  Guess what happens?  Some lunatic fuck shoots 18 people in Arizona because she "scoped" Arizona.
   One of the people shot was Gabriell Giffords.  A congresswoman from Arizona who was putting a speech when this lunatic prick put a bullet in her head.  I honestly feel that Sarah Palin should be held responsible to some sort!  Her quote of all time makes me puke.  "Don't retreat, just reload!"  You stupid cunt!  Stop being the tough gal.  Hell John McCain and his staff hated you and you even wrote about it!  I wonder why they hated you bitch!?
  Your own daughter moved from Alaska to be away from you and your circus.  The bitch moved to Arizona the day of the fucking shootings.  To bad you weren't there for the bullshit! Your best bet Sarah is to move on and make life easier on other people.  You have no idea about what life is like.  Stay put up in Alaska and hunt your cariboo and bear.  Keep fishing and making life happy.  Learn to give your husband blowjobs and all is good.  Just stay out of American politics!

Thursday, January 13, 2011

Snow in 49 states.

  It has been reported that snow has fallen in 49 of a possible 50 states, this includes Hawaii.  Well hell people.  Welcome to my fucking world!  I live in the heartland where it has snowed in the last 3 days 17".  Get over it and move on.  This shit will eventually melt.
   The only state that the snow hasn't fallen in is Florida.  Here's my opinion of the situation of Florida.  Fuck you!  Stop being pussies and join the crowd and bring in some snow.  Whenever it gets to the freezing level in Florida, people get all queezy and shit themselves.  OH my Oh my Oh my! The oranges will freeze!  What about when we have a drought in Iowa?  I guess there aint going to be any fucking corn that year.  People in Florida never worry about us up here.  SO fuck you Floridians!
    Why do people in the southern states drive like idiots when it snows?  Most people in the world own front wheel drive vehicles.  The key to driving in the snow is to slow down and be careful.  Do not be a fucking idiot!  It's simple as fuck people.  Its so cold here they complain!  Guess what?  You wont be cold if you dress right.  Put on some goddamn gloves and a fucking coat.  Not rocket science there people.
   A little old lady went out the other night to cover her orange tree.  She fell down and froze to death.  Isn't this such a tragedy?  Ummmm NO!  The bitch should have never left the house to take care of that shit.  Stay inside and turn on the fucking furnace.  Life will be good then moron.  In retrospect, the old bitch should have died for her stupidity!
    My bitch for this blog is this.  Snow is snow.  WE do not have to over think any thing about it.  The shit will melt and you can drive on it if your not fucking stupid.  If you let the dog out to take a shit and it dies it's because you left the poor little fucker out to long.  If you are going out for a walk and the next thing you know you have frostbite it's because you were retarded and didn't get back inside in time.  Do not be retarded!
    I know it's snowing like a motherfucker all over the United States of America but we need to settle down and relax about it.  Once again.  The shit will melt!  If you for some reason do not have heat in your house, go and buy a fucking space heater.  Just watch what your doing with it.  Do not leave it unattended.  There is always a chance that it could catch on fire.  Other then that people, sit back and watch some HBO and enjoy life.  It will melt!

Wednesday, January 12, 2011

My dream job.

   If you haven't figured it out by now, I love athletics.  I love anything to do with athletics.  There aren't to many sports I won't watch.  My favorites are college football, college basketball, volleyball and baseball.  I figure because I'm to old now I can't play it and want to do more then just watch it, I've decided I need to work in sports.
    My dream job would be to be an announcer of the games for which I love. I think my dream job would be for me to be an analyst for my favorite college teams.  I'd love to do either play by play or color commentating.  Who wouldn't want to do this?  You get paid a better then average wage to just kick back and announce the obvious of what you see on t.v.  
    You get to travel with the teams.  You get to be honest about what your seeing and most people will agree with you.  You get to go to the places in the world you've always wanted to and get paid for it.  You get to make long lasting relationships with people who will go on to professional athletics and still call them your friend.  If I couldn't be a television analyst, I would love to work for a sports magazine.  You get to travel all over the world and report what your seeing.  You can do human interest stories that will make a tear drop from about anyone.  You can cover the biggest games in the world all for free and getting paid at the same time!
    You can watch and report about the ups and down of being a major athlete or athletic team.  You can see  anguish and triumphant joy all at the same time.  I would love to be that "cub" reporter or analyst that get's "discovered" and the next thing you know your on some kind of national stage.  It could either be a major magazine or even better, some major network sports television show.  This is where you can give your honest opinion and have millions and millions either agree or disagree with you.  
    Now if I can get Chris Berman to read this and discover me everything will alright.  If not, that's ok with me.  I'll just go back to bed and find a new dream job.  I just pray to God above it's not being a janitor.
January 8th, 2011 Jared Loughner opened up with a semi automatic weapon and shot 20 people with atleast 6 dying that day. One of the dead was a 9 year old girl who was there to see her hero. We as citizens of the United States of America are in mourning. This doesn't matter if your a Democrat or Republican. This is total bullshit all the way around.
When Loughner walked into a "Sportsman's Wharehouse" and buys a glock handgun, this is a fucked up situation. He is a person of mental problems that wasn't picked up on the radar of people who sell guns. Congresswoman Gabrielle Giffords was shot point blank in the head over nothing. 20 people were shot over nothing. The reason these people were shot was because Loughner was pissed off over their politics. Then there's the "hit list" that Sarah Palin put on her website. Telling people where she was going to "take down" congressmen and women for their beliefs. This nut and other nuts looked at this utter bullshit and concieved and opinion!
For this Sarah Palin you should be brought up on charges of being a fucking retard that incited idiots with guns. Trust me when i say this, I believe in the 2nd Amenment. I believe in the right to bear arms. Just don't give them to retards and psycho nuts is all I ask! Don't incite people to kill people Sarah Palin!
Then theres this fucking douche bag who needs to die him self. His name is Fred Phelps. He's the douche bag who keeps picketing places and funerals if he feels that people are worthy of his shaming them. He's the guy who brought his church to different funerals of homosexuals and keeps chanting that GOD HATES FAGS. FAGS NEED TO DIE! AIDS KILLS HOMOSEXUALS!
His plan is to be at the funerals of the people who died in Tuscon, Arizona. These people aren't confirmed homo sexuals or anything like this. They are Democrats and Phelps wants to give them hell for being Democrats! Whats a fucking cunt he is! Fred Phelps needs to be locked up for contributing to riots and other sorts of bullshit! He is a straight up shit starter!
As for Jered Loughner, he's a fucking wack job! He'll get off with a plea of insanity. That in itself is bullshit! Put his ass to death because he knew what he was doing. I dont give a fuck if he was sane or not. This morbid fuck planned this whole thing out. That in myself tells me he had enough smarts to commit this travisty!
I just pray that the police get their collective shit togther and stop the picketing from Fred Phelps. He needs to be gone as soon as possible. If a sniper knocks him off, I wouldn't be sad, I will say that!
Let us all heal and tell Sarah Palin to fuck off and keep her fake ass in Alaska!

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

The Ultimate Fight.

I'm sitting here tonight kicking back with a beer and pondering the past college football season. I'm flipping through channels on the old tv when I come across "StrikeForce Challenger Series" on The Showtime Network.
It's all about ultimate fighting. You know where two people get into an octagon cage and fight using mixed martial arts. You can either knock your opponent out, make them submit or beat them by decision. I have to say that these men and women who are doing this are some of the finest athletes I've ever witnessed. My lord above they have to be some of the toughest son of a bitches known to man!
Strike Force Challenger Series, Ultimate Fighting, MMA, and other pro leagues are big time. They have the pay per views and are on television all the time. Then you have your local redneck leagues. I've been to a few of the local events and came away honestly very impressed with a few athletes. It's the punk fuck kids who are just out of high school and think they are bad asses. Most of the little cocksuckers are doped up and have no clue what the fuck life is all about.
You have a few different styles of "local" fight action. You have the programs that are ran by a couple of fat fucks wanting to make a few bucks by watching some "kids" beat eachothers asses. Then you have the programs that want to think they are going to be a nice league someday. The ones how rent out the local American Legion Hall and put on a program. Usually you have some tougher "kids" fighting here. There are title belts at stake with these federations.
Then you move to the semi-pro leagues. This is where it gets actually really interesting. You have athletes that fight here wanting to get to the big time. You've got a local public access cable tv show recording this and showing it at a later time. You have fan clubs and t-shirts getting sold. You have 2,500 people showing up at actual nice venues. Were almost to the bigtime. This is when you see some serious action going on.
At this level you have 2 to 3 guys who will have the chance to make a name for themselves. These two or three are usually the "main event" for the night. You still have some punk fucks who come in all drugged up and thinking they are the baddest motherfuckers on the planet. Or thats what they tell people back home in the trailer court. If by chance you get to see some of this action live, I want you to take the time and go! It's well worth the entrance fee. Just make sure to watch the "real" fighters wanting to make a name for themselves. The other fuckheads can just go away.

The Curse of the Blue Devil.

Down in the southeast part of the United States is a nice little place called North Carolina. This Atlantic Ocean border state is one of the most beautiful places on this place we call earth. The grass is green, the mountains are some of the most amazing things you could ever vision.
You have southern hospitality. You have the home of NASCAR. You have tobacco road. You have pure beauty in this state. Last but not least, you have the most important thing for this state. You have college basketball. Some of the greatest basketball to have ever been played has came on the courts of North Carolina.
We've seen Micheal Jordan, James Worthy, Christian Laetner, Bobby Hurley, Grant Hill and countless others grace these fine courts in North Carolina. You've got The Demon Deacons of Wake Forest University. You have one of the most storied programs ever in The TarHeels of North Carolina. Then there's one of the finest schools to ever have a basketball program. The Duke University Blue Devils.
Moving up the ranks as the all time winningest coach (#2) is the Blue Devils head coach Mike Krzyzewski. Coach K is a little man that looks like he should be that nerd accountant for the local Methodist church. He has that look like if you yelled at him, he'd piss his pants. He looks like the type of guy who's mother made him take piano lessons for 4 hours a day 6 days a week.
The funny thing is that he's far from all of that. He is a mastermind who's competitive attitude is one of the most intense I've ever seen. While he paces the sideline, he'll cut a referee verbally like you've never seen. The great thing about this man is his humility. He can be very witty as well as very shy. My favorite sport of all time is over until next season. The football season has came and went. Now it's time for basketball.
If you ever get a chance to watch a Duke BlueDevil game, make sure to sit down and study everything about this team. You will see teamwork, you will see fundamentals, you will see a coach in a league of his own. I am no way a Duke Blue Devil fan, I just love to watch the sweet science of everything they do.
My prediction for the year is that Duke will be in the NCAA Championship Game come the first week of April 2011

Monday, January 10, 2011

After tonight's BCS National Championship game, Cam Newton has reported that he will announce if he is going pro or not. After watching this 6'5" 250lb quarterback all season I'm here to encourage him to do so. If he wins the National Title, then he has nothing left to prove. Earlier this year he won the coveted Heisman Trophy with ease.
Newton has been dogged all season by rumors (found true) that his father pimped him out to to highest bidder. Mississippi State ratted out the older Newton and now the NCAA is about ready to jump all over this rumor.
Cam, you've done things at the college level I've never seen a quarterback ever do before. You made Tim Tebow look like a junior high player. You scared the shit out of defensive coordinator's all over the country. You've made it look to easy. I'm figuring that you will easily go in the first round of the NFL draft this spring. You won't be the first quarterback taken but that's ok sir.
You claim that you knew nothing about any payments to your father. Personally, I don't believe you one bit. That's just my opinion, nothing more. After this season, I personally see a HUGE scandal erupting all over the college football world. Your seen Pete Carroll jump ship after last season at USC. Urban Meyer just "retired" again from Florida. We're in for a fall out all over the NCAA.
I find it funny that Urban Meyer retired for basically no reason other then Cam Newton played at Florida for one season and suddenly quit the team after being accused of stealing a laptop while on campus. There's more to the story. Let's wait for the fall out. If your smart Cam and I think you are. You put your name in for the NFL draft right after the game tonight. You get a job playing pro then watch as the NCAA strips you of your Heisman and your team of it's wins for this season.
Watch for Florida to fall apart also. Something was terribly wrong in Gainesville or Meyer would have never left. Get your NFL cleats on Cam and make something of yourself.

Sunday, January 9, 2011

The making of a National Championship Team.

  Here it comes.  Less then 24 hours we'll find out who the NCAA BCS National Championship Football Team will be.  We have Auburn University vs. The University of Oregon.  My lord above this could be an ESPN Instant Classic.  Both teams come in undefeated and look motivated.
   You have two different style of coaches.  You have Chip Kelly at Oregon who wins with class and teaches his principles about football along with his principles about life.  He's about more then football.  He's about life lessons.  Yes, he wants to win games, thats his job.  He also wants to help people to succeed in life.  He's a true gentleman of the game.
  Then there's the Auburn head coach Gene Chizik.  He's pretty much a low life who doesn't care about how his players get along after he whores them out.  Hell, it's almost been proven and soon will be that he pays for his best players.  Think Cam Newton.  This is a man who was given his first chance at being a head coach at Iowa State University.  He was given the keys to the city and truly fucked over not only a city but a whole university.
   Here's a man who came from Texas as an assistant coach with much regard around the NCAA.  Infact, he won a national title while defensive coordinator there.  He even won the assistant coach of the year before he came to Iowa State University.  At Iowa State he was given a starting salary of $1.1 million a year.  That has never been heard of before for any coach at ISU. Even in Dan McCarney's prime, he was just at that level.
  Gene gets to ISU and proceeds to do nothing but lose.  This is after promising the world to Cyclone fans.  Infact he told everyone within shouting distance that he wanted to be a Cyclone for life!  He loved ISU.  He loved the school.  He loved the city.  He loved the state and he wanted to do nothing more then kick the shit out of the Iowa Hawkeyes.  
   His first year in Ames, Iowa his coaching brought him a stellar 3-9 record.  After the season he called that a stepping stone for the future.  Things were going to get right in Ames as soon as possible he said.  He tells people he's working overtime during the off season because he's going to make some serious waves in Ames, Iowa.  He's bringing in the top recruits possible.  He's going to help ISU get over the hump!  He's got it going on!
    Next thing you know the new season starts.  Gene's all kind of pumped up!  He's looking for a bowl bid even before the first game.  He's making the Cyclone faithful sit on the edge of their seats!  God Bless Gene Chizik!  Guess what happens?  Gene and his really good coaching staff go 2-10 for the season.  I guess he's really good at blowing smoke up my fucking ass!  He should have his own porn site with this kind of expertise.  
   After the season Gene plays the bullshit suckass card and tells the supporters how he's going to make this up and look for brighter days out of the Clones!  HEY HEY HEY!  You wanna know what happens next?  You sure?  Well here it goes.  One day Gene gets a call.  It's a call from one of his former employers.  Auburn University.  The call goes something like this.  "Gene whats up dog?"  "Nothing, just chilling in the cold of Iowa.  you?"  "We might have an opening up for coach you down?"  "Fuck yeah I am!"  "Lets make it happen homie!"
   There ya go.  Gene's on a plane to Auburn, Alabama and he's introduced as the new head coach at Auburn.  Who in their right mind hires this fuck?  His career record is now 5 wins and 19 losses at Iowa State University.  What in God's name are the people of Auburn thinking boosters and fans alike want to know.
    After his first year at Auburn Gene Chizik goes 8-5 for the year.  Hmmm Not so fucking good at an establishment like Auburn in my opinion.  Fans and boosters are getting more pissed off.  Then here comes Cam.  Yes THE Cam.  Cam Newton shows up on campus this year.. Next thing we know Auburn is sitting at 13-0 going into the BCS National Championship Game.  Before this game without Cam Newton, Chizik's career record was 13-24 overall.  Even with Cam Newton his record is only 26-24 overall.  
   What's that tell me?  Chizik knows how to buy players and not so much coach.  Hell I could win 7 games with Newton at quarterback and me not knowing a goddamn thing about football.  It's that fucking simple people!  The moral of the story is this.  Gene Chizik is a punk fuck bitch.  He can't recruit with paying players.  His overall record is shit.  He isn't a man of his word.  He's a straight up liar.  He's a whore of the game!  His wife and him need to find God or something because there's a good chance they could go to Hell for their actions!  Gene Chizik is a straight up puke who doesn't care about his past.  It's all about his future!
                                           GO DUCKS!

How to make a living as a stripper.

  As Martin Luther King Jr. once said... "I have a dream!"  Well guess what Marty, I have a dream also.  I want to own my own exotic dance club.  I want to make the men and women of the world happy with nude dancers.
   I want to build a nice place with two levels.  I want to make this  a posh place where any class level will feel welcome.  In this establishment, we will not serve liquor.  This will be a "juice" bar at it's finest.  The patrons are more then welcome to bring their own beverage if they so please.
   This place will have the finest security money can buy.  This place will have the nicest dressing rooms for all of the entertainers.  Hell I might even start a pension program if all goes well.  I've got my establishment built and looking to open up anytime soon.  The problem is that I'm missing one thing.  Ahhh.  That's right.  I need the entertainment.  The dancers, the strippers, the poontang!
    So now it's time to start interviewing some fine ladies for the position of entertainers.  Here come the bevy of beauties that might want to be employed at my fine establishment.  A few simple rules are explained to the ladies.  No drugs.  No pimps.  No selling your pussy inside the establishment.  Pretty basic rules I do believe.  Now I'm starting to get questions of what's the best way to make money being a nude dancer.  
    Well ladies here's a point from a male point of view.  TO make money as a dancer, you have a few things to do.  First of all when on stage your job is to strip.  That doesn't mean waltz around in your bloomers and bend over now and then.  It means take your damn clothes off and shake some tits and ass.
   It doesn't matter if you have a small ass and big tits.  It doesnt matter if you have small tits and a big ass.  All that matters is that you shake that motherfucker like it was meant to be.  On to the next lesson.  When your dancing, your selling something.  That's you!  Every customer in the place is a potential customer of yours.  Look your customer in the eyes and make them feel wanted.  This is no different then selling Avon except your selling your pussy is all.
   The more you sell your "product" to your potential customer, the money you will make.  If that means rubbing your tittie's and fingering your pussy, then you do it!  Customer's will be more then happy to buy the product if it's demonstrated properly.  The great thing about salesmanship is that if your good and work to get better you will have repeat customers who will bring referal's.  
    You need to do lap dances.  No touching allowed on the customer's side unless the said dancer wants that.  When doing lap/private dancers you will charge extra then a normal group show out in public.  The customer will pay a fee upfront and tip as it goes for as long as he wants a private dance.  
   If by chance another hot dancer wants to eat your pussy while on stage, it's in your best interest to do it.  Now your talking heaps of money people!  Customer's love to watch girl on girl action.  It would do you best to bring out dildo's and maybe a farm animal or two.  Just a thought I wanted to let be known.  Now as part of you being my employee, you will have to pay a finders fee.  A house fee I should say.  If it weren't for this house fee, I couldn't pay for the nice dressing rooms or security.  
   I don't give a fuck where your establishment is located but you can draw customers from miles around.  In the right place a dancer can make between $500.00 to $2000.00 per night of work.  If you do it right, you can on a meager week working 3 nights make up to $1500.00.
Thats pretty good fucking money there gals!  
   You can look at it this way.  $1500.00 x 52 weeks works out to be $78,000.00 a year for working 20 hours a week.  Jesus Christ above that's some fucking money there!  In the big cities some dancers have been known to make between $400000.00 to $750,000.00 per year.  Thats just to show some tits and ass.  You don't even have to fuck anyone for that kind of money.  
     There's your lesson on how to make some money as a stripper.  If this field is calling your name and you think you can make it, I encourage it!